NOTE: You can only use an insult or a reply if you have already heard it from a sword-fighting pirate.

Insult: "This is the END for you, you gutter-crawling cur!" Reply: "And I've got a little TIP for you. Get the POINT?"

Insult: "Soon you'll be wearing my sword like a shish kebab!" Reply: "First you'd better stop waving it like a feather-duster."

Insult: "My handkerchief will wipe up your blood!" Reply: "So you got that job as janitor, after all?"

Insult: "People fall at my feet when they see me coming." Reply: "Even BEFORE they smell your breath?"

Insult: "I once owned a dog that was smarter than you." Reply: "He must have taught you everything you know."

Insult: "You make me want to puke." Reply: "You make me think somebody already did."

Insult: "Nobody's ever drawn blood from me and no one ever will!" Reply: "You run THAT fast?"

Insult: "You fight like a dairy farmer." Reply: "How appropriate. You fight like a cow."

Insult: "I got this scar on my face during a mighty struggle!" Reply: "I hope now you've learned to stop picking your nose."

Insult: "Have you stopped wearing diapers yet?" Reply: "Why, did you want to borrow one?"

Insult: "I've heard you were a contemptible sneak." Reply: "Too bad no one's ever heard of YOU at all."

Insult: "You're no match for my brains, you poor fool." Reply: "I'd be in real trouble if you ever used them."

Insult: "You have the manners of a beggar." Reply: "I wanted to make sure you'd feel comfortable with me."

Insult: "I'm not going to take your insolence sitting down!" Reply: "Your hemorrhoids are flaring up again, eh?"

Insult: "There are no words for how disgusting you are." Reply: "Yes there are. You just never learned them."

Insult: "I've spoken with apes more polite than you." Reply: "I glad to hear you attended your family reunion."